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2 min read

Which is the best protein bar?

I crunched the numbers on 42 protein bars to find out which ones actually give you the most muscle-building goodness per calorie and pound spent.
A dramatic Ukiyo-e style woodblock print shows a muscular samurai and a horned demon warrior battling amid swirling waves, each clutching protein bars like weapons.

The other day I found myself at a convenience store in Marylebone station, searching for a protein bar to help get through the day without succumbing to unhealthier alternatives. I’m watching my calories to drop my body-fat percentage, so I wanted to be somewhat conscious of my intake that day.

I was faced with a wall of choices, and absolutely no way to know which one gave me the best bang for my buck — both in terms of the most protein for the least calories, but also the most protein for the least money.

A quick search online only returned uninformative taste tests and thinly disguised marketing listicles. So, I fired up a spreadsheet.

What’s the metric?

I focused on two key measurements:

  1. Protein Density — protein per calorie (protein per 100g ÷ calories per 100g), revealing which bars provide maximum protein with minimum calories.
  2. Protein Economy — protein per weight-adjusted British Pound (£). I use weight-adjusted prices because price and the bar’s size are probably linked, and many bars are pretty light (e.g. 45g at the lightest vs 64g at the heaviest).

I then pulled a bunch of nutritional data and price data from manufacturers’ websites for 42 protein bars, specifically the following brands:

  • Barebells
  • Eat Natural
  • Grenade
  • Huel
  • KIND
  • MyProtein
  • Nākd
  • Nutramino
  • Warrior

Armed with the data and these metrics I thought I’d put together a Gartner Magic Quadrant-style graphic. After some sparring with Claude, I settled on the following:

  1. Pound for Pound Champs — Excellent protein-to-calorie ratio at reasonable prices. The ideal combination.
  2. Finance Bro Fundamentals — Overpriced protein-delivery devices, but still get the job done.
  3. Swole Survivors — Modest nutrition at economy prices, suitable for occasional consumption.
  4. Ego Lifters — Below-average nutrition at above-average prices, generally best avoided.

Check out my quad(rant) gains

Ok, so maybe I’ve had a little too much fun with the names.

I first came across Gartner’s Magic Quadrants back in my management consulting days. They were useful for my purposes back then and a quick and insightful way of comparing options. In future, I may adapt the below to add a function that lets you add your own data so you can compare whatever protein bar you find out there in the wild.

As an avid consumer of Huel, I was surprised and somewhat disappointed their bars didn’t perform better. However, I was glad that Barebells or Grenade take the trophy, as they by far have the best flavours.

If you want more protein bar content (which I guess now is an official category), check out Dr Mike wax brutal.